Jesse

Jesse- a forever friend.

 

Three weeks ago my friend Jesse went home to be in the presence of Jesus, his Saviour and Redeemer. I miss him and find it hard to believe that we won't hang out again, he won't be there when friends gather for games, we won't drink Rooibos tea together, we won't drive in his truck, or go for walks, listen to Jason Upton music together or do random things together like go to Construction Shows and operate our own excavators (!!) but I know that those memories are forever kept in my heart. I will forever remember the memories Jesse and I share together.

As I have thought of Jesse and reflected on our time together, I realized how for the time God put him in my life, I learned so much from him. I went back and re read some old entries I had made on my blog about Jess. Take a look: He had an eye for design and loved creating beautiful things with his work in Landscaping, he desired to grow in his relationship with Jesus, he took moments to be quiet and reflect, he understood that it is in community where we flourish and when we are vulnerable with our struggles, we can lean on the body of Christ to bring us before the Father, he was an everyday guy who had hopes, dreams and brilliant ideas that he wanted to put into action. I always enjoyed hearing his business plans and the future direction he hoped to go with his business.

One of my favourite memories of all of Jess is when him and I were driving back to Abbotsford from Chilliwack and I was complaining because he was being silent (now he was often content to just sit silently and think to himself- he didn't need to be heard and didn't need to always speak to be having a good time). I said, "Jesse, you are wasting our time! We should be talking and getting to know eachother; you should be asking me questions to get to know me and I should be doing the same. This is the opportunity to get to know eachother!" After a moment's pause, he said, "Victoria, I don't have to talk to have a good time. It's ok to be quiet sometimes. Actually, there's something to be said about simply spending time with someone. There is great value in being together." I've taken that nugget of truth from Jesse- to enjoy spending time with another person, enjoying their company.  That was a special moment for me and I remember it like it was yesterday.

With Jesse, I did things I would never think to do on my own- like go to the Art Institute in Vancouver to see what courses they offered because he was interested in design classes. Who knew I would spend time in a garden becasue of Jess? Who knew I would get into playing badminton or drinking rooibos tea? Who knew I would attend an AA meeting to discover the struggles of addictions? Who knew that we would have birds eat trailmix from our hands when we were snowshoeing at Manning Park last winter? Who knew I would be invited to Bright Nights at Stanley Park with his family 3 Christmases ago? Or who knew that I would help him at the Home and Garden show at the Abbotsford Tradex? In all these things, my eyes were opened to new things. Jesse knew totally different things about the world than I do. He always said that I was smart, having gone to university and earning 2 degrees, but the truth is that we both brought different things to our friendship. He taught me something new each time I was with him.

He sent me this picture while he was away

I remember walking at Douglas Taylor Park in Abbotsford- my faovurite walking trail in Abbotsford. He got it! He saw the beauty that I see there as well!

From when Jess was up in Dawson Creek

One time, Jess told me that I knew him better than he knew himself- what a statement to say! Honestly, I don't think I could know him better than he knew himself, but I knew his habits and I knew his patterns. I could tell when he was doing well and I could also tell when he wasn't. I knew that he desired to overcome the addictions in his life. I truly believe that Jesse understood the message of grace that Jesus gives because every time he sinned, his desire was to go running back to God, rather than hiding or continuing in that destructive path.

Oh the things we do! I remember several times, secretly dropping encouraging notes and verses on his truck so that his day would start with something positive. Come to think of it, I remember going to the Peppinbrook development in Aldergrove where Jesse was working and dropping off banana bread for him! I remember having dinner at Rendevous for his birthday a few years ago and eagerly giving him my present... the book Oh the Places You'll Go by none other than Dr. Seuss. It was an intentional gift, trusting that the words in the book would resonate with him. It describe life's journey and it quite accurately describes what Jess faced in his life- such highs and such lows.

Here's an excerpt from the book: "

You'll look up and down streets. Look 'em over with care.
About some you will say, "I don't choose to go there."
With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet,
you're too smart to go down any not-so-good street.

And you may not find any
you'll want to go down.
In that case, of course,
you'll head straight out of town.

It's opener there
in the wide open air.

Out there things can happen
and frequently do
to people as brainy
and footsy as you.

And then things start to happen,
don't worry. Don't stew.
Just go right along.
You'll start happening too.

OH! THE PLACES YOU'LL GO!

You'll be on y our way up!
You'll be seeing great sights!
You'll join the high fliers
who soar to high heights.

 I could keep quoting the book but that might be against copyright laws, lol, but I this relays what Jess lived- this depicts both the excitement and the struggles in his life.

Each time I hear the song "I lift my hands" by Chris Tomlin, I think of Jesse. This has often been my prayer for him. The chorus says, "I lift my hands to believe again, You are my refuge, You are my strength. As I pour out my heart These things, I remember. You are faithful, God, forever." I prayed this over Jesse often, especially when he was struggling.

In the midst of grieving I keep going back to the words that were spoken by Pastor Vic at Jesse's graveside service from 1 Corinthians 15, "Our earthly bodies are planted in the ground when we die, but they will be raised to live forever. ⁴³ Our bodies are buried in brokenness, but they will be raised in glory. They are buried in weakness, but they will be raised in strength. ⁴⁴ They are buried as natural human bodies, but they will be raised as spiritual bodies. For just as there are natural bodies, there are also spiritual bodies." This is Jesse's story.

 

I cherish many memories. I appreciate Jess in the truest sense and value the friendship we shared. I always believed in him and didn't give up on him.



Christmas 2012

 

Miss You, Jess. You are in the presence of Jesus, safe and held dearly.

Forever our memories will be cherished.

 

"My heart is confident in you, O God; my heart is confident" (Psalm 587: 7).

home SUITE home!

Hey Everyone! The grand unveiling of the new basement suite was last Friday. The contractors worked hard all summer and were delighted to show us the finished product! There were lots of "Oohs and Aaahs!" when we were let into the finished basement suite for the first time. Now I'm all moved in and so excited that I have this new place. It feels like mine with all my decorations, my Turkish Rug and a beautiful, spacious kitchen. My bedroom is still a work in progress, so you will have to wait to see pictures of it. Jill has moved in with me until December. I met Jill when I was training to go overseas and now she is here preparing to go long term wherever God has for her. My parents put in a lot to make this happen. What more could a parent want- their grown child being independent and yet, oh so close to home (just downstairs!). It is a bright, modern suite with lots of room for 2 people. Looking forward to enjoying this new place to call home!

 

You are welcome for tea and cookies... come on over!

Again, the kid in me comes out!

"Faith like a Child"- Jars of Clay

 

Did I grow up too quickly? Maybe I did. Maybe it's part of being the oldest child in a family. Maybe it's that I always wanted to impress my mommy and make her happy. I started talking and walking at a young age and have a strong desire to do the best I can at whatever I do. I set high standards and expect a lot of myself. That being said, when I am around children I can not help but show my playful side! I've been loving this season and any opportunity to play! Yesterday's Agrifair in Abbotsford was brought to a close with a Jars of Clay Concert. What was the highlight of my day? Dancing so freely with little 5 year old Jenna- twirling around in circles until I felt dizzy, seeing her run and then jump in my arms, dancing arm in arm around the whole concert area, putting her on top of my shoulders at the front near the stage and then laying on the ground with her sitting on me and giggling. These are the precious~ joyous ~ special ~ freeing moments in life that ought to be embraced and treasured. We danced and danced and it was a life-giving time for me. So Thank You Jenna, for giving me those special moments of bliss, delight and life! As we were dancing, Jars of Clay was singing their classic song, "Faith like a Child" and her and I would pause and sing out those words with everything in us.

Little moments of awesome:
~ cartwheels in a field!
~ kid hugs!
~ questions from kids!
~ sweaty muffins (fresh muffins)!
~ ice cream, ice cream, ice cream!

Summertime!

It's been a fun summer! I've been working from 7-1 at the coffee shop and then spending the rest of the time outside! The weather has been glorious! Here are a few pictures from summer so far.

 

Canoeing with Amy

 

first time "on" Mill Lake

Fun Fun Fun

Genevieve and Jere were in town visiting from Virginia.
It was nice to reconnect and spend time outdoors.

~ Inspiring ~

a good friend

Oh summer days! RELAX and praise God outside!

 

Made a delicious BBQ dinner at the Kaethler house

Charlie's Angels

I've been addicted to Menchie's! FROZEN YOGURT!
Perfect treat for any summer day!



Breanne and I helped at VBS at Church a couple of weeks ago.
Here she is dressed as Esther.

Hope you've had as much fun as I have this summer! Get out and enjoy it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IoxEsqwJjXM- Summer Nights by Rascal Flatts

The Next Chapter

Hello readers, I realized I said I would post a blog entry last Saturday, but never ended up getting around to it! Sorry if I've kept you in suspense!

To those of you who knew that I had an interview a few weeks ago, thanks for joining with me in prayer. I stand firm on the prayers of God's people.

Now I am excited to tell you that I have accepted a grade 5 teaching position at the Dasmesh Punjabi School starting in September. HUGE FAVOR was all over the interview. It was actually a very short interview, simply because they just stated that they had me in mind for that particular position! Their school is growing and they are adding a third grade 5 classroom. The only thing is that I actually went in there hoping for a kindergarten position... Although this isn't my preferred grade level, the door was WIDE open and I'm supposed to go through it.

 I feel like it's the best of both worlds- I get to work cross- culturally while being here in Abbotsford. While I was driving one day, I was thinking "Am I crazy?" I know it won't always be easy! This is a private school that was established so that  Sikh families would pass on their religious and cultural values to this current generation growing up in Canada. Each morning they start with prayers and readings from Guru Granth Shaib (the principal sacred text of Sikhism contains hymns and poetry as well as the teachings of the first five gurus).  

Risk Taking Obeience for me?  YES! This job doesn't include health benefits, the pay is a little less than average and I will be in an environment where I am not familiar with all the cultural norms. I don't know what it will look like to be a follower of Jesus Christ there. It's not my preferred grade level either. How will it look, Father? How will you reveal yourself more to me and those around me in the year to come?

But I look at this and again, I believe this is an answer to another "heart longing (dream)." Although, I never knew how my life would unfold, I surrendered my degree in education into God's hands so that He would have His way and use my life for His Kingdom.

I look back and remember how in each part of my life He has been equipping me for the next chapter- being in other cultures, being among those who have yet to encounter the love and grace of Jesus, different colours, flavors and food, and  teaching grade five for the last 5 months. I'm right where he wants me to be! I'm looking forward to  the coming year and ask for you to join me in Prayer, that the Holy Spirit would enable me to bear witness to the living God.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IIC-5fZjKMk

 

~ We live for moments like this! ~

~ Thank you Jesus that you put me exactly where you want me to be! ~

Happy Graduation to my Brother!

We are so proud of you, Brayden! Congratulations on finishing your Criminology Degree.

 

We know you have worked hard these last few years.

 

 

Vulnerability

Does that word scare you?

In Brene Brown's Ted talks lecture titled "The Power of Vulnerability" she shares her research on this topic. She suggests that those who feel the deepest sense of connection with others have chosen to practice vulnerability in the relationships they find themselves in. One may already assume the automatic correlation- the more vulnerable one is, the greater their level of intimacy with another person. Duh! But the point I want to camp on for a minute is what gets someone to become vulnerable? What causes someone to want to be open? What provokes or enables one to share, when the easier thing is to remain surface level and not openly distribute everything in your life like a newsprint? Why do we do what we do? Brown suggests that those who find themselves with the most satisfying relationships have a deep seeded sense of "worth." Those who attest to a sense of worthiness are not afraid to be real. 

I think about how we each require people in our lives to support us, invest in us and speak into our lives. I think about how the time people have sown into my life has spoken to me of my value. I reflect on this with a grateful heart, knowing that many do not have such positive people in their lives to build them up.

But then I push that further and submit to you that my worth does not even come from those people. My sense of worth can't just come from the amount of praise I get or the people who recognize my efforts, achievements or even character qualities. No, my worth doesn't even come from what I do [or don't do]. My worth comes from who Jesus Christ says I am. So I have to go back to His word and remind myself [often] of who Christ says I am. First John 3 says that I am God's child. This speaks volumes to me. There are so many passages that directly speak into my identity, as someone who is worthy.

I love this idea of "worthiness" being central to who we are because when we come to truly view ourselves as Christ views us, we are changed. Sometimes we need to be reminded of our identity. In the Message it says that "in Christ we find out who we really are and what we are living for (Ephesians 1:11)."

Have I invested in many relationships whereby I have chosen to be "real?" Yes! Perhaps when we know we are a "pearl of great value" we begin to view others that way as well. As I have reflected on my life calling, something that has taken root in my heart is precisely what I have been talking about. I've been thinking about how I desire to help others come to the realization that they are someone of great value because God purposely designed them and cares about every detail of their lives. I want to use my life to love others, that through acts of love, individuals would come to know their worth.

When it comes to vulnerability there is always going to be the "fear of exposure." When we are honest, people see our flaws and we allow others to know who we really are. One thing that still scares me is sharing who I am with someone and in return being rejected and hurt. Cynical? Maybe, but a possibility, right? In this scenario, I have to go back and allow God's view to remain the one position that holds the most weight. According to God, does rejection decrease our worth? Do situations increase or decrease our worth? No! So I am reminded to first go to God to be assured of who I am. Apart from Christ I am nothing. Christ loves. Christ's love compels me.