Does that word scare you?
In Brene Brown's Ted talks lecture titled
"The Power of Vulnerability" she shares her research on this topic. She suggests that those who feel the deepest sense of
connection with others have chosen to practice vulnerability in the relationships they find themselves in. One may already assume the automatic correlation- the more vulnerable one is, the greater their level of intimacy with another person. Duh! But the point I want to camp on for a minute is what gets someone to become vulnerable? What causes someone to want to be open? What provokes or enables one to share, when the easier thing is to remain surface level and not openly distribute everything in your life like a newsprint? Why do we do what we do? Brown suggests that those who find themselves with the most satisfying relationships have a deep seeded sense of "worth." Those who attest to a sense of worthiness are not afraid to be real.
I think about how we each require people in our lives to support us, invest in us and speak into our lives. I think about how the time people have sown into my life has spoken to me of my value. I reflect on this with a grateful heart, knowing that many do not have such positive people in their lives to build them up.
But then I push that further and submit to you that my worth does not even come from those people. My sense of worth can't just come from the amount of praise I get or the people who recognize my efforts, achievements or even character qualities. No, my worth doesn't even come from what I do [or don't do]. My worth comes from who Jesus Christ says I am. So I have to go back to His word and remind myself [often] of who Christ says I am. First John 3 says that I am God's child. This speaks volumes to me. There are so many passages that directly speak into my identity, as someone who is worthy.
I love this idea of "worthiness" being central to who we are because when we come to truly view ourselves as Christ views us, we are changed. Sometimes we need to be reminded of our identity. In the Message it says that "in Christ we find out who we really are and what we are living for (Ephesians 1:11)."
Have I invested in many relationships whereby I have chosen to be "real?" Yes! Perhaps when we know we are a "pearl of great value" we begin to view others that way as well. As I have reflected on my life calling, something that has taken root in my heart is precisely what I have been talking about. I've been thinking about how I desire to help others come to the realization that they are someone of great value because God purposely designed them and cares about every detail of their lives. I want to use my life to love others, that through acts of love, individuals would come to know their worth.
When it comes to vulnerability there is always going to be the "fear of exposure." When we are honest, people see our flaws and we allow others to know who we really are. One thing that still scares me is sharing who I am with someone and in return being rejected and hurt. Cynical? Maybe, but a possibility, right? In this scenario, I have to go back and allow God's view to remain the one position that holds the most weight. According to God, does rejection decrease our worth? Do situations increase or decrease our worth? No! So I am reminded to first go to God to be assured of who I am. Apart from Christ I am nothing. Christ loves. Christ's love compels me.
