Happy Graduation to my Brother!

We are so proud of you, Brayden! Congratulations on finishing your Criminology Degree.

 

We know you have worked hard these last few years.

 

 

Vulnerability

Does that word scare you?

In Brene Brown's Ted talks lecture titled "The Power of Vulnerability" she shares her research on this topic. She suggests that those who feel the deepest sense of connection with others have chosen to practice vulnerability in the relationships they find themselves in. One may already assume the automatic correlation- the more vulnerable one is, the greater their level of intimacy with another person. Duh! But the point I want to camp on for a minute is what gets someone to become vulnerable? What causes someone to want to be open? What provokes or enables one to share, when the easier thing is to remain surface level and not openly distribute everything in your life like a newsprint? Why do we do what we do? Brown suggests that those who find themselves with the most satisfying relationships have a deep seeded sense of "worth." Those who attest to a sense of worthiness are not afraid to be real. 

I think about how we each require people in our lives to support us, invest in us and speak into our lives. I think about how the time people have sown into my life has spoken to me of my value. I reflect on this with a grateful heart, knowing that many do not have such positive people in their lives to build them up.

But then I push that further and submit to you that my worth does not even come from those people. My sense of worth can't just come from the amount of praise I get or the people who recognize my efforts, achievements or even character qualities. No, my worth doesn't even come from what I do [or don't do]. My worth comes from who Jesus Christ says I am. So I have to go back to His word and remind myself [often] of who Christ says I am. First John 3 says that I am God's child. This speaks volumes to me. There are so many passages that directly speak into my identity, as someone who is worthy.

I love this idea of "worthiness" being central to who we are because when we come to truly view ourselves as Christ views us, we are changed. Sometimes we need to be reminded of our identity. In the Message it says that "in Christ we find out who we really are and what we are living for (Ephesians 1:11)."

Have I invested in many relationships whereby I have chosen to be "real?" Yes! Perhaps when we know we are a "pearl of great value" we begin to view others that way as well. As I have reflected on my life calling, something that has taken root in my heart is precisely what I have been talking about. I've been thinking about how I desire to help others come to the realization that they are someone of great value because God purposely designed them and cares about every detail of their lives. I want to use my life to love others, that through acts of love, individuals would come to know their worth.

When it comes to vulnerability there is always going to be the "fear of exposure." When we are honest, people see our flaws and we allow others to know who we really are. One thing that still scares me is sharing who I am with someone and in return being rejected and hurt. Cynical? Maybe, but a possibility, right? In this scenario, I have to go back and allow God's view to remain the one position that holds the most weight. According to God, does rejection decrease our worth? Do situations increase or decrease our worth? No! So I am reminded to first go to God to be assured of who I am. Apart from Christ I am nothing. Christ loves. Christ's love compels me.

Every good thing

My class is loving this New song by the Afters called "Every Good Thing."

 

~ Thank you Jesus for the good things you put in my life! ~

 

 

We dance and sing and praise God for every good thing!

I don't want to miss the moments like this!

Life is so sweet

This is what You do...

You make me come alive...

I posted the link to this song on my last blog entry and here I am reposting it. "Coming alive" is one of the themes in my life. "Awakening" is one of those words that resonate with my Spirit. I love when you're in a spot and KNOW that's where you are meant to be. It gives life to your whole being.

Last week I got to check off something from "my list." In a post last year, I mentioned several things that I dreamt of doing. One of those things was to participate in the 10 km Vancouver Sun Run. As you may be aware, I have been training and was excited to enter the race this year. There was a sense of anticipation as I saw one of the things from my list become a reality. I had never been in a formal 10 km run before. I was thrilled! I'm so glad I had my friend Michelle to go with. Before running I made a personal goal to run the entire thing. I had heard this run is the biggest 10 km across the country, with sometimes upwards of 50 000 participants registering for it. I had heard there are so many people that you have to dodge people as you run, making it somewhat tricky to get a personal best time- hence, I made my goal to run non-stop, rather than aim for a certain time.

 

We woke up at 5:30 am to take the  sky train into Vancouver.

We arrived at 8am so I could get my shirt and bib and make our way to our starting position.

Here is a picture of the start! We were divided up into colours (different heats)

 determined by our estimated time category.

 

 

I love how this event included all sorts of people- young, old and everyone in between! The man who started beside us had his little grandson cheering for him at the sidelines saying "Go Papa, Go!"

 

 

 I'm so proud to say that I accomplished my goal- I ran the entire thing!

 

Something that stood out for me during the run was all the people standing at the sides cheering us on. Every time someone cheered for me, I took their words as if they were speaking right to me and directly cheering me on. Because of those supporters, I kept going! Honestly, stopping didn't even seem like an option to me because these people motivated me to keep going. They gave me strength and more determination. Around the 5 km mark we got to run over the Burrard Street Bridge. That 1 kilometer was so much fun! The last two kilometers also stand out to me because we could see BC Place, where the finish line was. The end was in sight and again, it was motivating to push forward.

 

 It was an awesome sense of accomplishment to cross that finish line and know that I achieved my goal! I was also impressed that I ended up with a time of1 hour and 1 minute.

 

 

The run was so rejuvenating for me. The three weeks prior were pretty emotional. I had been processing the death of 3 people and was trying to make some big decisions in that time frame as well. After the run I felt like I had been given more life. I was grateful that I could run. I was grateful that God refilled me.

With the picture of all of those "cheerleaders" standing on the sidelines, I have been spending some time sitting on the passage in Hebrews 12 where it says, "Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God." I am thinking of the powerful imagery of those people who didn't even know me standing there to encourage me. Although I don't fully understand it, I think there is a parallel here with those Christians who have gone before us. In their lives, they followed Christ as he led them. Sometimes their dreams were fulfilled and other times they had the faith that one day it would be accomplished. Now somehow those who have gone before us join with heaven and cheer us on. We get to be part of some of the things they started. Any other insight into this? We may not realize it, but we are continually being "cheered on." Not only do these saints cheer us on, but also God does too! He knows my name! He gives me all that I need to accomplish His will for me. It's a pretty awesome feeling to know that the God of the universe is cheering us on!

shout out to Michelle (way to go girl! You DID IT!), my Dad (love you), Curtis (cheering me on each Monday and Wednesday. focusing on Jesus), Shantel (my workout partner. persistent. motivating.) Tammy, Virginia and Sandra who join the cloud of witnesses and have gone before us.

Time with the Famjam

Here are some pictures from our Easter Weekend in Powell River

 

The ocean

just hanging out

Is she cute, or what?

ME!

Grandma and I

Our hotel

Enjoying the outdoors

Sisters

and another one

family outing

It's a new season: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z482u6Crf84 

- "This is what you do" (Bethel)

 

"b.e.  a.l.i.v.e. !"

List of Awesome!

A number of weeks ago for staff devotions, J shared about the "Book of Awesome!" This book reminds people to look at those little things each day that brighten our lives. Some examples shared were finding money in your jacket pocket (awesome!), giving a baby a high 5 (awesome!), getting two candies from a vending machine when you only put in the coins for 1 (awesome!), and the list goes on and one. I decided to do this as a class and definitely enjoyed the responses I got from the students in my class.

This past week I took a little Spring Break Holiday. Although Saskatchewan and Manitoba aren't exactly your typical vacation destinations over Spring Break, I had been planning for and looking forward to this trip for quite some time because I was visiting some people who are dear to me. The first leg of my trip was in Saskatchewan, visiting the B family who I spent last year with in Tky. I love them to bits. Ruthie knows exactly what I love and thoughtfully planned out what we would do, where I would sleep, what we would eat, and where we would go. She is a lovely host! While I was there, I decided to keep a "list of awesome!" It's amazing to have that kind of approach to life. Keeping the list of awesome has caused me to pause and consider what the Father has put in my life.

Some of my list of awesome from my time in Saskatchewan:

- Finding cards made for me from the kids when I arrived... awesome!
- Finding Abbie and Caleb waiting for me outside of my bathroom the morning I woke up... awesome!
- Sledding in Saskatchewan... awesome!
- Walking into church and hearing one of my favourite songs being played... awesome!
- A king sized bed... awesome!
- Abbie losing a tooth while I was visiting... awesome!
- Lots of hugs and love from the kids... awesome!
- Ruth's cooking... always awesome!
- The familiar worship songs being played from Matt's ipod... awesome!
- Being there when Abbie got her ears pierced... awesome!
- Dessert... awesome!
- Not setting an alarm... awesome!
- Snow pants... awesome!
- Caleb telling me that I mean the world to him... awesome!

My life is blessed! I am rich because of the people God has brought my way!

On Wednesday I took the Greyhound (8.5 hours) from Regina to Winnipeg. I visited my friend Brenda, who I met back in 2004 when we sang together in the choir at church. Brenda and I had fun going in the hot tub, working at her shop, going to the symphony, and... Going to Kenny's farm!

I had never seen baby calves up close like that before.

After seeing the little calves I got to go snowmobiling for the first time. I love firsts!

 

So what was your "awesome moment" today?

Take a moment to consider it... and thank the Father!

Who's the student?

I'm here, at one of my frequent study spots from when I was in University. I feel like a student again. I feel like people are looking at me with my thick binder, computer and earphones and wondering what I'm studying. Truth be told, I'm the teacher! And I'm doing my lesson planning. I'm learning about the human body and currently learning about the "Skeletal System" so I can teach these 10 year olds who are full of energy and questions about the world! What am I learning in this whole process?

I'm learning that I'm the student. I will always be. I'm learning how much I have to learn! I'm learning that each day is a new day for growth and opportunities. I'm inspired by my students. They have this love for reading and it has got me wanting to catch that enthuisiam for it as well. I've intentionally decided that when the class has silent reading for 30 minutes, three times a week, I will read too! It's amazing how this class looks forward to silent reading and how they actually sit quietly for 30 minutes without disruption reading! I've decided that rather than doing assessments or sitting at the computer, I too will pull out a novel and join in the delight of reading. It's been a pleasure so far to sit on the floor and get into a book with the rest of the class.

From this I've come to better understand what it means to model for others what you wanto to see in them. If I want my students to read, what better thing for them to see than me reading as well? I'm not exempt from reading or from partcipating in what I'm asking of them. Secretly (well now not so secretly), this is one of my greatest leadership tactics. Effective practice= modeling. Effective leadership= modeling character, expectations, etc. Actions speak loudly. Repeated actions ought not be overlooked because they are done for a reason. So when someone continues doing something, we ought ask, "What are they trying to model?"

I've thought a lot about being proactive rather than reactive, realizing that an effective leader anticipates what could be as a result of given variables. The effective leader knows how others may respond to such variables and prepares for that. This person examines all angles and devises strategies (either verbally or internally) to deal with a given scenario. Isn't it helpful when someone approaches you with insight into something before it happens, with ideas you may have never considered before? I've learned that planning ahead means a lot to people and it frustrates me when people come after something happens that they didn't foresee to apologize for their oversight. I'm grateful that they recognize their oversight; however, I expect leaders to be able to have the foresight to devise a "strategy" rather than get caught off guard by something.

I feel like I've been quite strict these last 4 weeks in the classroom. This is not me; however, aren't we taught that it's better to be firm at the beginning to gain the class's respect and then we can ease off after they know the epectations?

One of the highlights of my day is when we begin the day with prayer. I open it up for the students to share their prayer requests/ praise items and then pray together as a class. I love when C prays for the mom of the boy who sits beside him, who has major health concerns. She is not overlooked. She is not forgotten and has become part of our class. I love when they pray as they know how. I love when they thank God for things like Birthdays, hockey games and PE. So often their prayers are that "God would help [insert name here]. I've oftened wondered what that really means, but then I've come to realize that it's not a little prayer. God is our help. Our help comes from the Lord, strong and mighty.

I've learned how important space is. When I first got to the class it didn't feel like mine. It felt like I was visiting someone else's house, but it wasn't mine. Since then I've done some re-arranging, added some new decorations and made it feel like my space. A space can impact how we feel. A space can make us feel comfortable or uncomfortable; at home and at ease, or anxious and uncomfortable to name the polars. How can we make the space we're in most condusive to learning? to relationships?

And the ongoing one? Patience. I'm learning patience. Often I can give a snappy answer, but I'd rather give a gentle re-direction with a pleasant tone.

I'll keep you posted as I continue to learn. So who's the student? Do we have a teachable heart?